The above image is a self-taken snapshot (or, “selfie”, as they’ve come to be called) of one Mr. Trevor Phillips, captured during a recent trip to Mt. Chiliad in Whetstone, San Andreas — Mt. Chiliad is the tallest peak in the state of San Andreas. (That’s Mt. Chiliad in the background) Trevor likes to travel and he enjoys all of the unique and exciting experiences that come with traveling. He particularly enjoys all of the colorful and interesting people he meets on his travels. He most certainly does not, however, sometimes enjoy doing horrific and unspeakable things to those people. What’s more, Trevor Phillips also likes taking photographs of himself on his travels using his cell-phone — in order to document his experiences for posterity and to share them with the world.
So, today we’re going to share a few of Mr. Phillips’ more recent selfies. We hope you enjoy seeing them as much as Trevor enjoyed taking them.
The above two images are of Trevor Phillips attending a couple of wild swinger’s parties taking place at some rich dude’s mansion. Trevor likes to party. You can see in the second image that we’ve had to censor a young lady’s upper region. These parties, apparently, can get pretty crazy. On the night of Trevor’s second visit, someone, apparently, killed everyone at the party with a mini-gun for no apparent reason whatsoever. Good times! I’m sure the gruesome slaying must have taken place after Trevor had left the party.
If you’re wondering why Trevor, as the above photos depict, wears his sun glasses at night, we have it on good authority that it’s actually for a number of reasons. Amongst the most important of these being: So he can watch you weave and breathe your story lines, keep track of visions in his eyes, forget his name while you collect his claim, see the light that’s right before his eyes, and possibly something else.
In the above photo we see Mr. Trevor Phillips in a remarkable selfie. He appears to have been visiting an LTD gas station location somewhere in San Andreas and managed to snap a pic of himself just when the station experienced a catastrophic explosion. An unfortunate incident for those inside. Trevor himself wasn’t seriously injured, but it’s unclear as to whether that’s his blood on his shirt, or someone else’s.
The cause of the explosion is not currently known.
Trevor likes both beer and guns! He was excited to find this sign and thought it would make a great selfie. And, it did! Trevor is having this one enlarged and framed to hang over the bar in his rec-room.
On a recent trip to Blaine County, near Stab City, Trevor spotted a couple of kooky hippies doing Yoga.
Some humorous graffiti seen on the same trip to Blaine County, not far from where the hippies were practicing their yoga. Beam me up! Indeed!
HA HA! A “Pharte” gas van! I wonder if the owners of that business know what the business’ name sounds like when you say it? “Pharte” and gas — a very funny coincidence if they don’t! Trevor thought this was really funny. Trevor thinks that anything to do with farts is really funny.
Whoah! Is that a blimp in the middle of a street in downtown Los Santos? Nice parking job, buddy! Trevor has certainly seen many remarkable things on his travels!
What went on here? It looks like two dead police officers on the highway. What an unfortunate scene to happen upon. …we’re sure Trevor did just “happen upon” it. I guess whoever did this must have gotten away. Just think of those officers’ poor families! Oh well, live by the sword, I guess. They probably had it coming to them. San Andreas Cops are notorious for shooting at people for very minor infractions — like standing too close to a police officer for too long a time. Perhaps Trevor could sell this image to Weazel news?
Whoah! What’s this? It looks like a dead armored car driver lying in a pool of his own blood. Trevor seems to have incredibly bad luck happening upon these sorts of unfortunate incidents. It looks as though Trevor also got some of the armored car driver’s blood on him — probably while trying to help the poor man. This could be another shot for Weazel News. Perhaps Trevor should think about taking up freelance photo-journalism full time?
It looks as though the cops have arrived to check out the scene of the tragedy. In an unfortunate coincidence, a little research has revealed that the officer in the photo was killed that very same day while on duty at the scene of this very crime. I’m guessing it must have happened after Trevor received commendations from the officer for his attempts to help the driver and then left the scene.
Details of the officer’s murder are unclear and the suspect in the slaying remains unknown and at large. Apparently, police did pursue the suspect as he fled the scene in a stolen car, but they gave up the search after about two to three minutes. Nobody, it seems, really got a good look at the guy. He was able to evade police by turning a number of corners onto a few different streets. Very shortly after police gave up the search, a police car, it is reported, did pass right by the suspect in the stolen car they had been searching for only seconds before — but, by then, the cops had already put a few minutes into the search and if they hadn’t managed to grab the suspect by then, why bother anymore?
Some unfortunate chap appears to have slipped and fallen on some wet stairs. Trevor certainly does seem to happen upon quite a lot of tragic incidents. I suppose some people just have that sort of mojo.
Some lighthouse somewhere. I don’t know. I’m not sure why he took this pic. It’s kind of stupid. I guess he likes lighthouses or some shit.
Again, some pointless, ‘touristy’ type selfie pic. Out in the country at the Bayview Lodge in the Paleto Forest with some lumberjack statue, or something. I dunno… from a hunting trip or something.
HA HA! Look at the sign behind him! It has become dislodged and a part of it has fallen down, so it looks like it says “Muff sale”! Ha ha! That’s funny! (It’s really supposed to say “Muffler sale now on!” but the “ler” at the end of “muffler”, and the “ow on” at the end of “now on” is being covered by the fallen portion of the sign, so the sign appears to say “muff sale”) Ha ha!
Oh man! Another funny selfie from Trevor. It’s an advertising billboard that says “Cherry Popper” on it. And, it kind of looks like boobies! Fart jokes, muff jokes and booby jokes are funny to Trevor.
Just some cool graffiti from around Los Santos. I don’t know who Alphonse is, or was, but apparently he’s dead and either enjoyed basketball, or very large, orange suckers.
Trevor and his friend Almustafa, who works at a local convenience store. Sadly, Almustafa is now deceased. He was killed later on the very same day that this photo was taken, during a robbery at his store. Almustafa’s killer is still unknown and still at large.
Whoever did it killed Almustafa by tazing him repeatedly with a stun gun. Such a sad and pointless waste of human life — especially considering that the killer only got $348.00 from the store’s register. And, by all the evidence gathered at the crime scene, it appears that Almustafa had co-operated fully with the assailant, and was killed anyway. Unfortunately, all of the store’s security cameras were malfunctioning that day. Police, apparently, have no leads. Sad.
I don’t know what’s going on in this pic.
Real class every nite! Trevor loves strip clubs (he actually owns The Vanilla Unicorn in Strawberry — you should check it out!), strippers and dressing up in pretty dresses. Here he is pictured with one of the lovely dancers from his club who has been caught in Trevor’s selfie mid performance. She looks like a very talented young lady.
[Please NOTE: The above is a work of humor and parody. ReallyWeirdThings.Com is not associated in any way with Rockstar Games, or the Grand Theft Auto video game franchise.]
UPDATE, October 5th, 2013: Trevor Phillips continues to roam around San Andraes taking his selfies. Here are a few of his newest ones: