Dada Eyeglasses on the Face of a Talentless Sensation

Really Weird Justin Bieber

Justin Wore a Comical Outfit

And now, the veteran New Yorker
pointed the finger of blame at his his fellow popstrel
he marched over to his neighbour
who is a wealthy businessman
took out his Ferrari
and yelled, ‘You can’t drive like this!’

celebrity status,
outrageous behavior,
the sands of time have also ran out

he told the Sun
he does have one trick up his sleeve

on the verge of collapse,
a result of
discipline,
in three years time
he will be facing criminal charges


I Love You Justin, When…

I Love you Justin
when  you are
a powerful
muffin
so ripe with blueberries
your voice rings
like empty pastries

What happened to artists?
we have no need of them
anymore
now
we have
Justin

Talent is a worthless thing
worthy to be forgotten
by history
now
we have
a wonderful,
marketable
product

now
we have
Justin

I love you Justin, when
I am hungry
for soda-pop
and candy-floss
and all the things
that provide
worthless
sweetness

I love you Justin, when
I do not require
nourishment

Who needs nourishment
anyway?


A man named Justin walked for miles one day. He walked until his feet began to hurt. And, when he stopped, all was silent and still. He stood motionless for a moment, pondering the vastness of the space around his head. And, in the distance, the faint song of wild sparrows he heard. Justin sat in the short grass of the green field he had been traversing. He could smell fresh Jasmine in the air.

He reached into his pocket and retrieved a small amount of some strange powder, said to produce hallucinatory reactions when taken orally. He had purchased the powder from a wandering gypsy only that morning. He opened the small packet that the powder was wrapped in, and tipping his head back, let the fine granules of the bizarre substance slide into his open mouth.

It wasn’t long before he was completely naked — having furiously stripped off all of his clothes while repeatedly yelling “Mr. and Mrs. Hampton! I have no want nor need of your apples!”

Now exhausted from this action, Justin lay back down in the grass — his eyes peering skyward, when suddenly he became aware of a foul presence. Justin looked up to see a man, dressed all in black, standing not far from him. The man stood silent. Justin felt fear.

“Who are you?” Justin managed to shakily squeak out.

“My name is Applegate.” The stranger answered, “Mr. Applegate.”

“Why did you sneak up on me like that? What do you want? Why are you watching me?” Justin frantically responded.

“Because, my boy,” the stranger replied, “I have an interest in you. You, my boy, will serve my purposes.”

And, with that, the strange man lifted his hand and chanted a peculiar phrase in some unknown language. Justin felt dizzy — the ground where he lay seemed as though it had turned to liquid.

“And now, it is done.” The stranger exclaimed, “Your future has been cast. Through you, I shall set my influence upon the world.”

“I don’t understand.” Justin said. “This is all very strange. What influence? What are you talking about?”

“Don’t mind all that.” The stranger replied, “Go, and do now what it is you feel it within yourself to do. And, forget about me.”

The stranger then turned and walked away. And, as Justin watched, he could swear that he saw the receding stranger slowly dissolve into transparency. Justin rose to his feet and, all at once, felt a powerful urge to sing.